LEMON STING

Well, what a fantastic spring day it was until about an hour ago!

To celebrate this, the official end of winter (WINTER IS NOW GONE, WINTER NEVER CAME, FUCK WINTER!!!) I took a ramble across Olympic park into Stratford. Once there, I played with money and when that was done with, I bought a lemon tree from Wilkinsons....

Wilkinsons is currently my favourite shop and today the choice of fruit and veg plants on display was outstanding: There was blackberry, raspberry, strawberry, blueberry, blackcurrant, fig, onions (red or white) asparagus, artichoke, grapes (red or white) apple and pear trees...

Frankly, I need a fucking garden installed here on Fish Island - There's more than 40 plants in the house and shit loads on the balcony and that's before spring planting has even started. It's getting like a rainforrest in here. Unless I get the situation under control, Sting'll be taking up residence and making a record about fish beauty using traditional instruments and native speaking men in short skirts...

Talking of which I heard a good Sting story from Lauren Laverne whilst waiting to do my KLF rockstar line last Tuesday (you're a starfucker Fullbrook)...I'll relate it in a minute just as soon as i've stuffed my face...